Whiting's Writings - My Life |
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Take it up a notch! 31 Dec 2005 OHMAHGAWD!!!! As I typed the date I realized I need to fashion a new image for the new year. Hmmm.... Well, anyway, I'll do that tonight and surprise y'all tomorrow, okay? For now, however, I want to spread some good news.... er, sorta good news ... potentially good news. Last night a friend called me from New York. She's been in the knitting industry for DECADES, and was calling to meet a need in her own realm, which turned out to be EXACTLY what I was wanting. You see, she is in charge of a fleet of free-lance pattern writers -- both knit and crochet. From what I gather, it entails taking a designer's notes and ideas, and actually writing out the stitch-by-stitch technical instructions. It's not necessarily a lot of wealth directly, but she said many of her pattern-writers do this free-lancing stuff and have enough to live on, even if not becoming rich from it. Minimalist that I am, I don't have a large need for a lot of money just for the sake of having a lot of money. My needs are simple, and my expenses quite low. Plus, these people do it from all over the country, which means I could do it wherever I live, either here or Texas, or on a mountain top in BFE. But, if I remember correctly, I wrote a while back (No, I don't go back and read everything I wrote before so I don't know if I wrote it, or just thought about it a lot) I need to learn how to write patterns. How cool is this -- someone seeking me out, wanting to throw money at me, and putting me in a position to learn how to write industry-standard specifications while I'm doing it on their nickel!!!! Woo-hoooo!!!!! After all, if I intend to design my own pieces and market my own patterns, I have to be able to write them correctly so that people can follow them, right? I've been wanting to learn this and perfect this skill, and now there is an opportunity for me to do exactly that! Now, I don't know if I'd wet myself in joy over the tedium of technical writing. No matter, it's a way to make money from an industry I want to be a part of, have enough to pay basic bills, and to do it from wherever I choose to live. So, she's going to send me a few typical/sample projects so I can actually see what it's all about, see if I can tolerate doing it, and get my feet wet. Plus, she's in a position where she knows all her counterparts who also have a flood of work to be done, so it's not like it's a one-time shot. It's an ongoing proposition, if I choose to pursue it, for as long as I choose to pursue it. How cool is that???? Oh yes, and while we were talking (well over an hour and a half!) she also filled me in on some of the 'insider' techniques that other people are using for selling their own designs and patterns on line, which is another thing I mentioned here that I need to learn -- marketing! Woo-hooo!!!! So, when we got off the phone last night, I was totally jazzed, excited, and pumped up. My mood was taken up a couple notches, y'know? I realize I need to keep my current job for as long as I can, if for no other reason than to pad my pocketbook against my move to Texas next summer. It will be good for me to move forward, building multiple streams of income in this way, so that if one thing dries up, there are still other streams still coming in. Katrina really fucked up a lot of things, but it also set into motion a totally different path for my life. Ending the year on a positive note is very pleasant, indeed! |
Nia (Purpose) 30 Dec 2005 To make our collective vocation the building and developing of our community in order to restore our people to their traditional greatness. (This was delayed from posting last night due to some good news I'll describe later). This is another one of those Us vs. Them principles that I find so nasty in this collection of principles, reinforcing that segregationist thinking. But never mind that. The principle of HAVING a purpose, declaring it, and making it the focal point of one's life, is a good thing whether one is from Africa or Ireland or Japan or someplace else. We have to deliberately ignore the notion of restoring "our people", as if "our" people are different from "their people". That's bullshit, y'know? There's no such thing as "our" people any more. We're all just people and we're all obligated to find a way to live on this one planet. So fuck the "our" people nonsense. We need to make our collective vocation the building and developing of our communities to restore all of our lives to traditional greatness -- restoring our culture, our language, our customs, manners, tolerance for diversity, and all the rest. We need to stop tolerating so easily the downward spiral of communication, manners, language, education, and so much else. Making the restoration of society to greatness entails a lot of things ... and also rejects a lot of things. One thing worth rejecting is the silly notion that "those were the good ol' days". Bullshit. THESE are the good ol' days and THESE are the only days we have. We also have to reject the notion that all the elements of THESE days are necessarily bad. Society and its culture are malleable, moldable, and full of vital energy. It's been mismanaged and misdirected in many cases, but the whole of it is still a viable mass of pliable and quite plastic energy. Water is incredibly heavy. If you want to move water from 'here' to 'there' you can bust your ass and blow a hernia trying to actually move it. But with just a little nudge you can redirect the flow and it will follow the path of least resistance to wherever you want it to go. You cannot easily MOVE water, but you can use the natural properties of water and just nudge it to where you want it. Society is, for the most part, a moveable object, filled with blind followers. This is not a bad thing, just an observation. And, like water, the mass of society will quietly follow along whatever channels are provided. It should be our vocation to create channels of opportunity, avenues of creative expression, so that society is nudged and moved into greatness. Water will conform itself to the shape of whatever vessel you pour it into. Why do we allow the societal vessel to be shaped into ignorance, neglect, and abuse? Why not create a shape of greatness, morality, and so forth instead? |
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Find a Path and get on it, dammit! 30 Dec 2005 Are you navel-gazing?? Stop it! Well, that's the idea of the article anyway. And there is a good point behind it -- rehashing the trauma-du-jour isn't healthy, as we already know. That link was posted on the forums today, and then I commented: I can see how replaying certain events in one's brain can be incredibly detrimental, whether it is the horrors of Katrina that some people experienced, or lying in bed reliving that tongue-lashing from the boss until the wee hours of the morning. The body doesn't always know if it is 'in the moment' or just reliving memories -- it responds similarly, including the adrenalin rush and all the other bodily responses. (That's why men suddenly cross their legs and wince when they see a bicyclist on TV fall onto the cross bar of his bike, or why most people pucker up when thinking of sucking a lemon.) Reliving the horrors of our Katrina moments over and over isn't healthy (and those who are stuck in the 'instant rewind and instant replay' mode need to get help -- it's not their fault and it happens frequently with stressful situations like this). BUT!!!! It is good to (1) take a good and rational look at what happened (past), (2) assess the current status (present), and (3) get a rational and realistic view of all possible paths that lead forward. Once you've gotten a grasp of most of the possible future outcomes, you are better prepared to actually begin moving in a direction of choice. Otherwise, you're just giving in to the victim mode or victim mentality, and taking whatever comes along by default. New Orleans (as a city) and New Orleanians (as individuals) can't much afford to rebuild by taking the 'default' mode, blythely accepting whatever gets dished out or happens. At least, that's my perspective. I know that in my own experience, I feel a lot more grounded because I know what happened, I know what my life is like today, and I have measured out most of the available options for my personal future. And (most important) I'm taking the steps necessary to implement my choice. I truly hope New Orleans can do likewise. And, I think it is true. Constantly harping about how bad New Orleans is, or how bad it was pre-K, or how bad it might be post-K .... it's all bullshit. We had a hurricane, it blew out some faulty levees, over 1,000 lives were lost, thousands and thousands of homes were severely damaged and/or destroyed completely, the city infrastructure is fucked up totally. Okay, we get it. What to do about it? Well, hell, I don't know. My options are no better than anyone else's, I suppose ... but then, their options are no worse than mine, either. Get over it. Either make New Orleans into a better place, or go somewhere else. Personally, I'm going somewhere else, because I don't see a long-term future for me here. And, having made that decision, I am going through some really weird times in my head and life. Sometimes I feel a great lethargy sweep over me, and I fall to the floor and nap for an hour or two, wherever I happen to be (at home, obviously, but not near the bed). Later.... cooking pasta and sauce for supper this evening, then going to watch a couple shows on network TV, and then pop in a movie or two after that. A long evening of knitting ahead. I'm heading up a new project (or actually, something I thought up a few weeks ago is taking shape in a different way). "Bundle-Up New Orleans" will be knitting and crocheting hats, scarves, mittens, or whatever is needed for those who lost everything in Katrina, back when it was summertime and not many people were thinking of winterwear. A lot of it will be done with the New Orleans Knitting Meetup group, but there will likely be publicity to accept things from other crafters in the area. I need to meet with some of the other key players in the group over the next few days and will then be in a position to ask for yarn donations and other assistance. This will likely be a short-lived program (through the winter months), at least for the start. When the new Web site goes up Jan 1 I'll have more information for those who are interested and want to help. By the way, I wanted to share this family portrait, taken when I was young: ò¿ó è¿é ô¿ô Daddy always furrowed his brow, and mother always arched hers. That's me in the middle, the one with bifocals. I'll be back later to post thoughts on today's Kwanzaa principle . |
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| Ujamaa (Cooperative Economics) 29 Dec 2005 To build and maintain our own stores, shops and other businesses and to profit from them together. Hmmmm.... Okay, this strikes a resonant chord in me -- building my own business. But again, there's that "Us vs. Them" mentality that I hate completely. It says, let's build our own businesses and pass money around in our own little circle of stores. I would no more patronize a business because it was owned by whites or blacks, that to shop at a store owned by gays, or Universalists, or whatever. The annotation attached to this Principle smacks of separatism. It is WRONG to shop at a store or hire a company JUST because it is "owned by a bruthah". It is WRONG to shop at a store just because it is owned by gays, or by people claiming a religious affiliation. You shop at the business where you get the products and service due any paying citizen, regardless of the stickers on the front window. If you deal with the person and can vouch for his character, so much the better, but it is based on the man's integrity and service, NOT his race or religion or some other artificial determinant. Now, having said that, I DO believe in supporting independent businesses and other places where people are controlling their own lives. There's a small "Afro-American Bookstore" around the corner from me, sharing space with "Beaucoup Books" -- two small businesses in one shop. I picked up three books today. It turns out one had to be rung up on the Beaucoup register, and the other two had to be rung up on the Afro-American register. Doesn't much matter to me, as they are both small independent businesses, sharing space after Katrina, working cooperatively (!!) and making it happen to benefit both businesses. Each business keeps its own stock of books, and they each draw a different type of customer. Once inside, the customer is free to look at all the offerings, so both businesses benefit. That's a cool way of working things out, and I don't mind supporting them locally. When I start my business, I expect that I will be favored by people who like what I have to offer. I'm sure there will be some who think it is cool to do business with a "MALE Knitter", but really I would prefer that I get business on my real merits, not my sexuality or gender. (Although, I must confess -- if being a male helps me to stand out in the crowd, I'm not above reaping the benefits. I'm just not using that as a particular draw.) But now, it is after my bedtime, and I really do need to get to bed. The last few days have been totally sucky for regular sleep, and I've had increasing pain in my legs which isn't helping. So... off to bed I go. See ya! |
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WOW!! 29 Dec 2005 Ohmahgawd!!! My brain is all a-flutter this morning with projects to do -- cool and crafty ideas of things I want to make. Right now. Today. All of it. <*sigh*> Life's a bitch sometimes when you have SO many cool ideas, that you can't even write them down, they're coming so fast. What's up with that??? Yesterday (or the day before....?) I was talking with my older daughter about my plans for the future. She asked whether I was sure I could actually make money doing the things I want to do. Reasonable question, I suppose, and quite fair. I have no intention of landing in my kids' collective lap and expecting them to look out for me. But like I told her, I'd willingly take a part-time job or two if it meant living closer to my kids, and NOT having to live in New Orleans. If I had a piece of property, with suitable utilities, I'd live in a square of converted shipping containers if it meant living on my own terms. Yeah, I know, it sounds weird and unusual. But I know for a fact that shipping containers can be converted (I looked it up online), and are often used for marketing kiosks, construction-site offices and workshops, and other things. I've even seen them advertised as being converted into emergency survival shelters. I'm just weird and unusual enough to think it is a possibility. I don't know what zoning requirements are involved, of course, or whether it would be "legal" to convert a string of these into livable space. But so what? It would be fun to put four of these units into a square, blow out some windows to the exterior of the square, and some sliding doors to the interior of the square to form a hidden courtyard. I think that would be awfully damn cool, don't you? I could get 3 of the 40 foot models, plus 1 of the 20-foot models (total of 1120 sq. feet inside!!!) , allowing room for an easy passage into the courtyard without tramping through the inside dwelling. I'd probably keep it closed with a privacy fence, of course, but the access would allow gardening tools to enter the space. Or maybe get just 3 or 4 into a star pattern or X-pattern, with all four joining at the center point -- creating a living wing, sleeping/bathing wing, etc. Hmmmmm..... Well, anyway, it's fun to dream, isn't it? WAIT!!! It's not just a "dream". Just for fun, I went scrounging around on the Web. And look what I found: There are other links as well, mostly to other places in the UK. I'm sure if I looked hard enough (perhaps with variant search criteria) I could find more examples of alternative housing options here in the States as well. The options just boggle the mind, no? ===== This article (2nd paragraph) totally pisses me off ... the paragraph about Larry and Lisa. How such a situation would be permitted in New Orleans pre-Katrina is beyond me. Hopefully the NEW New Orleans will not tolerate it. |
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Ujima (Collective Work and Responsibility) 28 Dec 2005 To build and maintain our community together and make our brother's and sister's problems our problems and to solve them together. I understand the "collective work and responsibility" to community, but the notation beneath it smacks of racist overtones again, dammit. Maybe it's because I've been immersed in the racist accusations over in the forums at nola.com. It's just that whenever I hear black folks talking about our brother and our sister, they are talking to other blacks and they are not including whites ... or Asians or Hispanics. It's one thing to appreciate and support one's heritage and culture. I don't hear much about Irish-Americans talking about our brothers and sisters, or Italian-Americans, or Asian-Americans. So why is it so common among the African-Americans?? And do people of African heritage have such difficulties in other countries? I do support the "we're all in this together" notion of community participation and doing what one can. I'm not a big rah-rah volunteer type person, joining 'causes' and 'projects' particularly. In a city like New Orleans, I'm not even sure how to address it. I mean, the city has become so fragmented it's like a bunch of little towns connected by common roads. I understand the concept behind this day's principle. I'm just not sure how to apply it effectively, today or almost any other day. I'm pretty sure it goes beyond showing up for work and being a "team player" when the paycheck depends on it. Collective work and community responsibility goes way beyond hoping everyone else on your block will mow their lawn and keep their dogs properly restrained. Understanding the concept and putting into practice are two different things. I need to work on this and figure out how I can contribute myself (and my Self) into collective working. ========== Other things ... The last 2-3 days my legs have begun hurting again ... enormously. I've been trying to walk regularly whenever the weather has been tolerable, and riding my bike every couple days as well, both for exercise and for transportation. I'm not sure if it is helping my joints or not. But I can't just give up walking, so I'll keep walking and riding the bike, and do what I can to stay mobile. I walked down to ACE Hardware to get the dowels to make a set of knitting needles for a contest in Jan or Feb -- on my knitting Web site (yet to come) I want to have a 'name the blog' contest. Well, they had all the right dowels to make a size 4 needle ... and some humongous huge-ass ain't-no-way big fat dowels. So I'm outta luck on that score for now. I'm also sort of stuck in how to size my branded needles. American sizing is really screwy and doesn't evenly correspond to metric sizing. I wish there was a genuine standard to follow. I will probably try to gear my patterns for metric-sized needles, just because it makes more sense to me. American sizes are just numbers. Metric sizes are accurately measured out by the millimeter. Oh well... it will all come clear in due time ... I hope. |
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I feel so inept today 28 Dec 2005 Ever since Katrina my internal seasonal clocks have been askew. I don't comprehend how we could have had Thanksgiving or Christmas already, when other time-markers haven't happened. I'm just feeling out of sorts, I suppose, stressing about things over which I have little control, while ignoring the things I CAN control. Sheesh. Anyway, I realize it is nearly the end of December. And I realize that January 1 is just 3 more days away. But I can't wrap my brain around the fact that I have just 3 days in which to finish tying together the new Web site and get all my shit together. It just seems too much, y'know. Fortunately, the world will not cave in if my self-imposed deadlines aren't met. What counts isn't completion but progress, at this point. Yesterday I treated myself to a coffee and knitting at Cafe Luna, after picking up a form for a business postal box at Parcel & Post. I want to have a different mailing address for business purposes -- just a mail-receiving box, but with a street address that is different from my residence address. This is important for business cards, legal mailings and so forth, to show that there is a separation between business and personal life, if nothing else. I needed to get that taken care of before going too public with the new business Web site, and I got the papers I needed, and tomorrow I'll go back with the papers and put my fee down and have a proper business address that I can post publicly. Very cool. So there IS progress and I need to stop beating myself up for not having EVERYthing done, right? Today, I need to draft out the first of a pair of holiday stocking patterns. Since I will creating kits for sale, it is important that I not only have the pattern and create an original piece, but I will then have to DEconstruct the whole thing and get a truly accurate measure for how much yarn to include in each kit. That way I will then know how much of each color to buy for proper packaging, which then leads to appropriate pricing. The cool thing about stockings (and hats and scarves) is that you can create the design and it is done... unlike trying to design fitted garments which would require a lot of re-working of the pattern to write instructions for various sizes. O'course, if I were to create KITS for fitted wearables, I'd have the instructions for all sizes, but include enough yarn for the largest size (plus some extra) and not make individual sized kits. But I think for starters I will stick with non-fitted items and non-wearing items (stockings, bedding, etc.) Oh yes, the devil is in the details, eh? So much to think through! And, at times, I really do feel inept -- especially when I look at all the other knitting blogs and see all the really cool shit other people make. Oy! Can I ever be that cool and crafty???? Of course I can -- and I have to keep reminding myself that I am marketing ME not marketing someone else, so it doesn't matter what others do. The fact that I am NOT a clone is what will ultimately set me apart and uniquely marketable on my own terms. Plus it helps to realize that all those cool knitted things I see elsewhere were created by DOZENS of people. No single person created alllllll of those things. I am not competing with the entire rest of the world, as if I need to produce enough to match everyone else altogether, y'know? Well, anyway... back to work I go! See ya! (today's Kwanzaa notes to come later) |
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OOOhhhhhh.... Lookie what UPS brought!!! 27 Dec 2005 Just as I as sitting down for the evening news, there came a knock at the door, and there was Brown with a little box. Hmmmm..... I wasn't awaiting any boxes, but it had my name on it.
Isn't it cute? Tied up in raffia in Mardi Gras colors (how cool), and such a pretty card, too! Well, after reading the card (an important step, you see), I realized it was from a friend from the Waste Not Want Not group that I belong to. This is one of the friends who called me a couple days after Katrina to be sure I was okay. Well, recognizing the sender, I knew it had to be something special inside, so I couldn't wait to dig further....
Wow! A set of four carved stones, with a golden mesh net bag to hold them in.... Each stone is a different shape, and each with a different word inscribed on them:
Harmony, Love, Wisdom, Peace. How cool. And you notice the Love stone is carved into the shape of a heart? Neat!!!! These will have to take their place among my favored stones:
These are various gemstones, crystal balls (and yes, a couple sets of <*ahem*> "crystal balls", in rose quartz and malachite), and even a geode (far left), which I bought in a matched pair -- the single stone neatly cut in half to reveal the inner chamber filled with shiny little crystals. A friend of mine from back in Santa Barbara holds the matching half of this geode, sitting on her kitchen ledge in her new home up in the mountains. I've not seen her since 1989 when I moved from Seattle to New Orleans, but we still write annually, and we both keep the geode out in plain sight. The geodes were sold with the legend that when parting, you give half to a friend. When you speak into your half of the stone, your friend with the other half will 'hear' and be in touch, or at least fondly think of you. Considering she is another one who looked me up right after Katrina (including contacting some of my journaling and frugal friends!), I'd say the legend works. Well, o'course, it helps that we are friends, too -- she was one of the first people I got to know immediately after my divorce and return to Santa Barbara, so she'll always hold a good place in my heart. So now I have some new stones from a new friend in a new place to add to my collection of "meanings and messages". As I look at them I realize that the values or characteristics of harmony, peace, wisdom, and love truly are 'rock-solid' and will not fail me. Knowing that I'm going through changes, I am grateful for this reminder of the basic simple principles like these. And the little golden mesh bag makes them easily portable. In the off chance that I come across someone who resists the wisdom, love, harmony and peace I bring to the world (especially the peace!), I can always swing 'em around in the bag and beat the shit outta the mo'fo getting in my face! bwaaahahahahaaha.... no, just kidding! (Sorry, but I just HAD to do that -- like they say, "strike while the irony's hot") Anyway, I really appreciate the stones and will keep them with my collection where I can always see them. Thanks, 'hippiemama'. |
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Kujichagulia (Self-Determination) 27 Dec 2005 To define ourselves, name ourselves, create for ourselves and speak for ourselves. Well, this seems easy enough; "seems" is the operative word. I suppose most of us would like to think we are defined by ourselves, but I can recognize in my own life that in many ways I am defined by where I live, the people with whom I associate (and those I don't), and in many ways my thinking is determined by external sources -- the news and local online forums, all my years of religious exposures, and so forth. Even the media and advertising presumes to speak for me. BUT... while I am evaluating my life post-Katrina, I am coming face to face with things that just are not true; some things never were true about me, and other things have become no-longer-true in m post-Katrina life. I noticed today while I was talking with a realtor, laying the groundwork for a move, that the kind of place I was describing to her was not the "normal" type of dwelling normally sought these days. I told her, "I specifically do NOT want a dishwasher, microwave, or garage. Those things are a waste of money and not at all related to the way I live my life." Hmmm.... so why should I put up with a fancy-dancy kitchen full of appliances that I wouldn't personally use, at the expense of giving up valuable storage space for building a pantry to store home-canned fresh produce??? Makes no sense. I want my life (and, by extension, my home) to be defined by ME ... and not to have ME being defined by my home or other externals. I want to NAME MYSELF, too. I realize many in the African-American community actually literally pick new names for themselves, reflecting what they believe to be their African heritage. That's fine, I suppose, but I think the concept of self-determination (as it applies to me, in my life) goes beyond the legal name, but also "what do I call myself"? I am a son, a brother, a friend, a father and grandfather -- names based on my relationships. I am an admistrator at work, a knitter among friends, and so forth. I met someone recently and during the conversation the inevitable question came up: "What do you do?" I answered, "I'm a professional knitter." I think I was as surprised to hear me say it as she was, since she'd never met a professional knitter before. For a split second, I thought to myself, But you aren't getting your income from it much yet so how can you be a "professional" if you aren't making money at it??? Being a professional includes making money at something, but it also comes with a measure of quality of workmanship, pride of the work, and so forth. The things I do, especially the things I make for others, I intend to be the best workmanship I can muster up. Neat stitching, good coloring, invisible construction, and so forth. So that split-second of self-recrimination and doubt was quickly dispelled. I have the right to NAME MYSELF. Admitting to myself and the world around me that I am a professional knitter is a useful step in determining my future. If I said I knit in my free time, it would sound like (and be dismissed as) a hobby in my idle time. As much as I think about it (the designs, the marketing, etc.), I wouldn't call it just a hobby. Self-determination is a key toward my success as a person. I have actively chosen to let go certain things and limit my spending in some areas, in order to fund the future I have determined I want for myself. I am willing to live in a small and ordinary little place if necessary. Part of my goal is to be self-sufficient, with an income directly related to my efforts, but the other part of my goal is to be autonomous and not locked into someone else's work schedule, pay scale, or other "system". I am tired of having to do things just because that's where the job is. I'll keep the current job long enough to have some money when I move, but I truly do not want to retire at 67.5 years old after many many boring years in civil service. I've done what I could there and it's time for me to either shrivel up and die, or go somewhere else. That's not unreasonable, is it? |
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Umoja (Unity) 26 Dec 2005 To strive for and maintain unity in the family, community, nation and race. The idea of striving for and maintaining unity is a good principle. I dislike the reference to "race" here (and throughout the Kwanzaa observance) simply because these values are not owned by any one race. I particularly dislike the notion of trying to strive for unity among a race, because it seems to separate Us from Them. Further, it puts people in the position of having to choose between aiding a "brother" (of one's own race) and aiding someone deserving of aid on personal merits and worthiness. I see it in many areas -- patronizing "Christian"-owned business just because the owner claims to be a Christian, regardless if the work is good or not. But anyway, I will expand the racial reference to include all of the human race. Unity among family -- I realize I cannot always be the peace-maker between family members, nor should I try to be. What I can do is to recognize the strengths and weakness of all of them, so that if one has a spat with another, I can say, "Yes, but..." and offer a different perspective. But, just because they are "family" doesn't mean I have to put up with just any old thing, either. Unity among community -- what goes on in private homes is none of my business, but there are some issues of value to the community as a whole: well-rounded education and safe-zones for the children to learn and play; neatly kept yards and homes for a pleasant environment; a moral and ethical government for all the people; fairness among neighbors and fellow-citizens. This requires being able to speak up for justice when necessary, even when it is unpopular. Unity among the nation -- holding and supporting the values that make our nation what it is ... and what it can be. Unity doesn't require uniformity on all points. There must also be a diversity in the family, the community, or the nation. The ability to support diversity while maintaining an underlying unity can be a tough balancing act, but it is essential. Nobody has to relinquish autonomy and self-identity in order to secure unity. |
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Kwanzaa 26 Dec 2005 Today is the beginning of Kwanzaa, a seven-day observance celebrating traditional African cultural values. This brief piece is from Kwanzaa.org: Kwanzaa is a week-long holiday observance held from December 26 to January 1 honoring African-American heritage, primarily in the United States. Timed to serve as an alternative to the growing commercialism of Christmas, it was founded in 1966 by Ron Karenga (Ron Everett). The name Kwanzaa derives from the Swahili phrase 'matunda ya kwanza', meaning "first fruits". The additional "a" was added to "Kwanza" so that the word would have seven letters, one for each of the Seven Principles, or Nguzo (originally, Nguzu) Saba, of Blackness. Each of the seven days of Kwanzaa is dedicated to one of the following principles. In order, they are: * Umoja (Unity), As is customary with most holidays, hosts of Kwanzaa
observances choose the best and most beautiful items to display and
use. This means taking time to plan and select the most beautiful objects
of art, colorful African cloth, and fresh fruits so that every object
used represents African idealism and a commitment to the holiday in
the best of ways. It is customary to include children in Kwanzaa ceremonies
and to give respect and gratitude to one's ancestors. Often libations
are poured, an African custom that has survived in the African-American
community to this day. The Official Kwanzaa Web Site is also very useful. There I found an expansion of the 7 Principles being celebrated:
Very cool. And if you go to the original Web page where I copied these, you can see the visual symbols associated with each principle. Obviously these are brief, summary statements of the essential principles being celebrated. If you wanted to Google the term "Kwanzaa", or any of these individual terms, you could probably come up with lots of illustration, explanation, and so forth. I'm not going to do that (just yet). I am not African-American, nor does my lineal heritage harken back to the African continent, as far as I know. But that's okay. These 7 principles are not owned by any one group, nationality, race, or culture. For good or for bad, most predominant cultures throughout history have had a measure of each of these. But anyway, my reason for posting these principles, and giving a shout-out to all my readers of African heritage, is that I want to spend these 7 days looking at these principles, and interpreting them or understanding them on my own before going to read someone else's sermons and essays to see if I understood it "correctly". I'll keep those as separate entries. = = = = Now, on another note, I'm not sure quite how to address this. The other day I was out shopping and happened upon a book-signing event at a local bookstore. I try to support independent shops, as well as encourage new authors, so I bought both of his books. His books present one perspective of the Black man's reality of living in New Orleans -- crime, racism, oppression, and so forth. The author has a BS in English, and a Masters in Library Sciences. I had difficulty reading the book because the language got in the way. Besides trying to write the dialect phonetically (always a mistake), the writing itself was just plain awful. Besides common spelling errors (e.g., "ya'll" instead of "y'all"), how the hell can an English major and Librarian write this sentence (referring to an event in the story): "It was an ugly seen." Or how about this one, describing arraignments in court, where bail has been denied: The man sat, cursing under this breath. The process continued quickly, each man rising, many of them aloofed and contrite, having been to jail before, bonded back to the streets before, and not really caring. They were tough enough to ride the time under court date. HUH? "aloofed"??? WTF is that? And how can someone be aloof AND contrite??? Aloof means: distant physically or emotionally; reserved and remote; contrite means: feeling regret and sorrow for one's sins or offenses; penitent. These men depicted in the court scene are anything but contrite! They've been through the system before and they were "not really caring". A little later the protagonist learned a big hot-shot attorney has replaced the ill-equipped family friend. This new lawyer is presented as being highly experienced, with contacts throughout the judicial system, but he speaks with the language of someone not-so-well-educated trying to imitate someone who actually knows what all those big words mean. It is embarrassing listening to someone try to talk above their learning (I hear it in New Orleans frequently), but to read it in a book is just painful. I can understand how an author will put words and language into a character's speeches, in order to paint a certain image of the character. But in the narrative of the story, the author needs to use proper language, and to use it properly. And it is clear that the story is trying too hard to make this guy into the victim of a racist judicial system. I am SOOOO tired of hearing such a victim-based perspective. This might be the way many black men see New Orleans, and that is regretable, too. But the longer black people buy into the victim state the longer they will self-perpetuate their own barriers and obstacles. Is it mean of me to say that? New Orleans has a reputation for turning out poorly educated citizens. Many of them mean well, and most of them actually do the best they can. The fault is not their own; the fault lies in the system that permits such a poor education. And then along comes this guy with degrees in both English AND Library Science, just reinforcing the stereotype. I'm not identifying the author or the book because I don't want to make him an example, or the object of public humiliation. I have to assume he is doing the best he can -- and the fact that he self-published his books shows he has the drive necessary to do things for himself -- but it is still embarrassing. Oh well... into the day I go. I'll be back later to write about Umoja (Unity). |
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Merry, Merry 25 Dec 2005 Wishing all y'all a blessed holiday. And a special hi to Ardi, Linda, Darla, Fran, Daena, Marsha, and a few hundred dozen other folks I'm not aware of, plus Susan, Donna, Bo, Ricky, Scott, Steve, Sheila, Shannon, their spousal units and assorted children, too. It is sunshiny and pleasant today, in the mid-50's. I took a walk down to Blockbuster to return "March of the Penguins" -- after all the rave reviews I was expecting a little more than I got, although maybe it's because it was on my TV screen and not a giant I-Max type screen. It was certainly interesting and informative, and the photography was certainly good. Being out in the sunshine today was good for me. Yesterday I delivered the scarf to its recipient down at Cafe Luna, mildly flirted with the other server on duty there (no, no -- he's involved and younger than most of my children, so it was all just mild pleasantries, really), and sat outside with my coffee and scone and knitted about an hour or so. The rain began as I was about half-way home, yet another 10 or 12 blocks to go. I had packed my little umbrella in my knitting bag, so I was fine. And I was pleased to note that while my wool sweater did get wet, it remained dry and warm inside. Very nice. I'm really torn this afternoon about what to knit. I know I need to knit a particular kind of cap, but that doesn't interest me today for some reason. Probably because the sun is shining and the cap seem sooo irrelevant to day. But colder days are coming, so I should probably just do it anyway, eh? I'm also having difficulty getting it started -- trying to cast on 8 stitches (using Emily Ocker's method), but tiny sock yarn on tiny size 1 needles is obnoxiously bad. I cannot hold onto five size 1 needles. My hands simply do not work like they used to. This could be cause for serious grieving -- my life is in my hands, literally, and if I lose fine motor control of my hands I am going to be SOOOO incredibly pissed,y'know? Hmmm..... o'course, if I DO lose fine motor control in my hands, and go ballistic, when someone says, "Oh, just get a grip!", I can honestly say, "I tried but it slipped!" bwaaaahahahahahahaha. Anyway, I might have to either do the damned cap on the machine (which would require a seam and I don't want a seam), or start from the brim and work to the crown, which I do NOT want to do on this one. Most of my hats start at the brim, but this one HAS to start at the crown, dammit, and it HAS to be in sock yarn, and it HAS to be on fine needles. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I'm also drafting the instructions for the Feather-and-Fan blanket I finished recently. I need to re-cast a tiny version so that I can photograph each of the steps in order. Adding sequential pictures to my patterns, along with working charts and worksheets for marking row-by-row progress is important to make my patterns worth buying. One thing saddens me -- the wealth of "free" patterns on the Web these days. Why would someone buy MY patterns when something equally sufficient can be downloaded for free? Hmmmm... I know, I know... it's just my own doubt and insecurity raising such objections. But I think all pattern-makers are feeling the same thing (along with musicians, writers, and others) so much of creativity is being made available for free that it is difficult to derive an income from it. But I am hoping that between patterns for my own design work, plus hand-crafted knitting needles and other tools, I should be able to at least supplement my income, don't you think? The thing I need to learn is marketing -- how to present my goods to a ready market full of people just waiting to thrust money at me. It would be grand if I could find someone skilled in marketing so help me find the right market. For example, I know that my baby blanket pattern(s) would sell just fine in knitting magazines. But I think they would also sell in grandparent-type magazines, or magazines for new mothers, and such. Or my patterns for hunter's socks (when I write them) would likely sell in men's magazines, or hunting/outdoorsy magazines ... or trucker magazines. It's just a matter of marketing the right thing to the right crowd, eh? Onward into the rest of the day, I go! See ya! |
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Back to Work 23 Dec 2005 Well.... just barely a week until it is 2006, and part of me still feels stuck somewhere around August 28. How bizarre. But no matter. I have a life to live, so I'll just have to take the last four months just the way it was delivered, suck it up, and press forward. I am working today on finishing a scarf I promised to someone to be delivered tomorrow. Why I get myself into these things I'll never know, other than it gave me something to do yesterday and today, and that's a good thing. And, delivering it tomorrow will give me something to do tomorrow, too! Another good thing! I am surrounded by good things, don't you know? :-) My mind is racing lately, trying to assemble a broad range of knitting-related avenues that I can pursue. I won't discuss most of them here for the same reason I don't unzip myself in front of everyone on the street -- I cannot be responsible for faint-hearted jealousy in others! (bwwahahahahahahaha). So I just keep my buddy tucked into the top of my sock and keep my business plans to myself. For now, anyway. Just another week or so and it will all be revealed. Two days from now is Christmas, and most everyone I know will be celebrating in one way or another. For me, it will likely be just another day. I don't have any decorations up, only got a small handful of cards in the mail (all neatly displayed on a shelf nearby), and I have way too much to do to mess with parties and so forth. Part of the joy of any holiday is the privilege of doing with it exactly what one wishes to do with it. If the weather is pleasant enough I'll go for a nice bike ride, or else take a goodly walk. A knitter pal (Hi, Sara!!) surprised me with a gift certificate from KnitPicks during the Wednesday gathering of the local Knitting Meetup, of which I am the organizer. I told her I'd have it all spent before I even got to bed that night, but actually I am still torn and tossed by it.... not struggling what to spend it on, but agonizing over all the other stuff I can't spend it on. Yes, I like KnitPicks, in spite of the fact that some folks consider them to be undercutting the Local Yarn Shops. I like them because I can buy yarns from them without asking for wholesale and STILL get them cheap enough I can sell them for a profit. (That reminds me... I need to inquire about relabeling, in case I want to market my own line of yarns under my own label. I wonder if they would let me do that.... hmmmmm.... I know other places re-label stuff all the time, so I don't know why not. Some of the most popular hand-painted yarns these days are simply dye-jobs on yarns from Brown Sheep and Louet, among other places.) (very COOL dye-jobs, of course, but dye-jobs just the same) (And, NO, I will not reveal which marketers are relabeling which yarns from which sources, so don't even think about asking!!!!) Anyway, I really like the local Knitting Meetup gang -- great bunch of knitters, and pretty cool people too. Besides being the only male in the group (I have no idea WHY, of course), I'm also one of the older ones. The younger women have a different take on the knitting market, and a different taste, which is really good. It helps me get a feel for what's popular and accessible for knitters at any skill level. This is important. But it's also important just to get out and socialize. Man-oh-man, I need that SO MUCH these days, since I"m not working in the office right now. That also reminds me.... come hell or high water, next monthly meetup I want to take my camera and get some pictures of this crowd of knitters. There really are real people, and it would be good to post a picture of real people doing real knitting on the Web page. I suppose I should get back to working on that scarf. While it is sunshiny I will walk down to Blockbuster and get a few movies to last over the weekend while I finish my handwork. But before I go, I wanted to share the electronic holiday card I created this morning, from my own kitchen.
See ya! |
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"Color is just too emotional" 21 Dec 2005 In the Dec 26 issue of Newsweek magazine there is an article titled, Katrina Kids: The Power of Pencils. It is by a woman who drove a van of supplies to her childhood town of Ocean Springs, MS. She says, "and as I passed my old house, I saw straight through my bedroom. The front wall was gone." She was taking supplies for children, including some art materials suggested by a pediatric art therapist. She was told: Given a choice of plain pencils, colored pencils and markers, kids who survive trauma often choose No. 2 pencils to keep the "affect" to a minimum. Color is just too emotional. Ohmahgawd, I can really understand this! Those who have known me for a while know that I am surrounded by color, whether it was the collection of colorpencils for my mandala work, or my yarns for knitting, or whatever. I'm not real big on formal "art" on the walls, but I have always been surrounded by colors, the more the better. I couldn't buy a box of 8 crayons, when the 96-color box was on the next shelf. And I rarely bought a single colorpencil -- have to buy the all-color combo boxes. Or yarns: I LOVE have the full range of colors of a given yarn style (like the sampler packs from KnitPicks -- one of each color within a given line). But I have noticed lately in my own work that the sweater I repeatedly return to working on is shades of grey. There is a variety of textures in the stitches, but the colors are gray. Not French gray, not olive gray, not steel gray. Just gray. (By the way, it's a seamless vest, knitted in the round, with the armholes and neckline done in steeks that will be cut later for the banding.) And I have a whole bunch of Toasty Toes hand-painted yarn, as well as some other yarns from Cherry Tree Hill, full of bright and beautiful colors, just waiting to be knitted up into something. Surrounded by colors and textures and fibers, I still return to the plain gray wool. Anyway, it is not surprising (but in a way, it is) to read that an abundance of color is so overwhelming. Art therapy is designed to help express what there are no words for, to get the upheaval and turmoil out from inside and onto the paper where it can be safely expressed, dealt with, and be done with. The depth and breadth of what everyone is dealing with, especially the kids who were physically riding out the storm (not in a place of refuge far far away), is so overwhelming that putting it out in color is just too much, too close, too painful. I understand that. I really do. I wish I didn't. I suppose as an adult I can mentally grasp the concept so that I can process it differently from how a child might. But that doesn't make it less real or less vivid for me. |
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The Sliver by the River 19 Dec 2005 Man, this is messed up! New Orleans used to be called The Crescent City. But in this article in USAToday, "Amid ruins, 'island' of normalcy in the Big Easy" we've been reduced to an island of 'normalcy' that they are calling The Sliver by the River. Sheesh! The sad part is that some of that depressing article really is accurate. There are reasons I don't "travel abroad" or venture off this little island. I can't. It is just too fucking depressing. When I went for the office holiday potluck luncheon on Friday, riding across town was a burden. Great to see the people, of course, but between the relative calm inside my home and the relative calm inside my co-worker's home lies a vast sea of the remnants of destruction. Shortly after my return from Houston, I went down into the Lower 9th Ward for work. It was traumatic just to see the remains of a neighborhood. That was the "lower income" part of town. Others later went into the Lakeview area (the "rich area") and said the damage was even worse. That was two months ago. NOTHING SUBSTANTIAL HAS IMPROVED! That's what the American public doesn't quite 'get'. And that's why articles like the one I linked to today seem incredible and almost shocking, that such conditions could persist. The article makes it sound like the lucky few of us in the Uptown area are in some sort of denial about the 'third-world' realities outside the neighborhood. No, we aren't. Not at all. The houses here weren't flooded, but we have just as many blue roofs as other parts of town. The water everywhere was shut off, as was the power, and other basic utility services. Our streets were just as lined with refrigerators as others places -- probably more because in other places the big appliances are still covered in rubble. Magazine Street continues to have piles and piles of trash all along some sections. No, we aren't in denial about the realities of our neighbors away from this 'island'. Sometimes I feel like I want to gather up the rubble and (like castaways on a island using stones and coconuts) spell out "H E L P" and "S.O.S." in letters large enough to be captured on the satellite cameras -- maybe someone out there might get a clue and actually start to DO something. What can one do? Like my cousin John wrote recently, after another of my wailings, "You would be quite justified, I think, if you were to, in every sense, tend to your knitting." Speaking of which, check it out! You know that baby blanket I've been agonizing over for so long? The one begun pre-Katrina and left hanging on the knitting machine during my exile? Well, here it is! Ta-DAAAAAAAA
And here's a close-up of the stitching detail:
While I am grateful it is done and ready to be given, I am even MORE grateful for the learning process. I could not find machine-knit instructions for this, even though this Feather-and-Fan pattern (also called Old Shale) is extremely popular and generall easy for hand-knitting, but the hand-knitting way just could not possibly be done the same way on a machine. So I had to break it down into various processes, get each process in its order and then build up the patterning rhythm to make it work. UGH!!!! It doesn't look "exactly" like the hand-knit version, but it's close enough in the main elements that it can be marketed as a machine-knitting Feather and Fan pattern! And it's all in the marketing, after all! Woo-hoooo!!!!! Stuff like this calls for an instructional video or something, do you think? :-) I'm wondering just how many people would actually bother with machine knitting this? Guess I'll find out when I try to sell the pattern, huh? And now that the machine is available again, I can start work on a basic winter sweater for me! I have two different colorways in Noro Kureyon, plus some other yarns that simply must be used. Onward into the evening I go, feeling like I accomplished something useful today! See ya! |
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Good Night = Good Day? 18 Dec 2005 Well, I had mostly a good night's sleep, so should I expect a good day to follow? M-H writes to ask about an RSS feed, about which I am less than knowledgeable. I gather it's a way for folks to know when my journal is updated. I suppose that's an easy way to let folks know I've had another little brain-fart or something. Actually in the new Web site I will likely be returning to blogging softwares, which will have such a notification thing available. I'm not comfortable with leaving comments open, because the last time I was inundated with spamming stuff. I may go to a registration model or something where real live people can get validated for access to post a comment, while leaving the spiders and bots outside and unable to post. WOW! Check this out: http://texandave.castpost.com/Dangerous_Intersection.wmv Later... Okay, so I got the baby blanket off the machine, and have most of the top edging done. I'll finish that and do the bottom edging this evening, then tomorrow weave in the loose ends and be all done with it. Then I get to whip up a few scarves for friends. Earlier this morning I took a brisk 40 minute walk to get the blood flowing, and have avoided napping through the day. I reeaaalllyy wanted to nap and started dozing off a couple times while I was knitting and watching Cirque du Soliel on TV. (Gawd I love Cirque -- it is SO COOL to watch all those folks perform!) But I didn't nap, so I'll be ready for bed at a reasonable hour and will have a good night's sleep. I hope, anyway. See ya! |
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Sundry Stuff 17 Dec 2005 This could be helpful: according to http://jindal.house.gov/News/DocumentSingle.aspx?DocumentID=37277 there is a piece of legislation yet to come before the House, which includes this little gem: Federal Income Tax Legislation: Identifies taxpayers whose primary residence was in the disaster areas from Hurricanes Katrina and Rita prior to the hurricane, or taxpayers who earned more than 50 percent of their income from the core disaster area in the previous tax year. The bill exempts income, up to $80,000, earned in 2005. Hey, that would be nice, eh? Dreaming Most Bizarre Last night was another very, very uncomfortable dream. I'd write it out, but I'm not sure the details are worth as much as simply noting I continue to have nightmares. When I woke, it was after 1:00 a.m., but I was determined to sleep again. I put on a pleasant instrumental CD and went back to sleep. I had some other equally vivid dreams, but the later dreams were much more pleasant... or at least more tolerable! I don't understand much about dreams, and don't care to, really. But it does tend to bother me when I have such vivid and detailed nightmares of destruction. Holiday Potluck Yesterday many of us from the workplace gathered at a co-worker's home. It was good to see everyone -- good people, good food, good environment. I found myself going outside a few times to play with the dogs there, just to touch and pet and love on them a little bit. O'course, I think I wore half of the puppy home on my pants. White dogs and black pants just don't belong together. But I really didn't mind. I liked the interaction with the dogs. And the people, too, of course! Later.... I managed to get my holiday letter ready and printed, got my holiday cards written, addressed, stamped, and sealed ... only to discover the postal carrier had come by EARLY today, so it will be at least Monday before they get into the postal system. And that is ONLY if there is mail being delivered to my house; otherwise, the cards will hang on the mail box until a carrier comes up the steps and takes them. If there is no mail to come in, they won't walk up 3 steps to take away whatever might be hanging on the box, plainly visible from across the street! Even pre-Katrina, I could have things hanging on my box to be taken, and the carrier would come up the landlord's steps to his door and mailbox, and STILL not even glance over and take what was on my box. So, the holiday cards will hang on the mailbox until they are taken away to be delivered. Oh, and did I mention that ALL of the mail drop-boxes that used to sit every few corners on Magazine Street were taken away? There is NO place to conveniently drop a letter to be picked up... unless I want to try to find a postal facility that is accepting letters, wait in line just to hand it to someone else. Sheesh!!!! "Vacation" For some reason, even with having the office holiday potluck yesterday, it somehow escaped me that NEXT SUNDAY is Christmas. Which means this coming Friday is the first day of the normal winter holiday break when the school is officially closed, and we wouldn't report for work again until January 3. Well, hell's bells, people, that means the year is almost over!!!! Shit!!!! I have a LOT to do between now and January 1, so I have told all the right people that I am using four days of annual leave this week. Basically it doesn't actually mean anything, except that I am not going to be using my time for job-related stuff, AND that I will not feel guilty for ignoring job-related tasks. So, fuck it .... I'm on "vacation" now. So there! And I have 16 more days in which to pursue my own tasks and projects and assignments and chores and hobbies and business-prep stuff. Woohooooo!!!! I can get a lot done in that amount of time, no?
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Traumaticalized 16 Dec 2005 Read Chris Rose's current column. Now. Just do it. |
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Sleep, Teeth, "Ethnic Cleansing??" 16 Dec 2005 Why is it that I can turn off the light at 9:00, fall asleep and stay asleep until after 5:00 in the morning, but when I stay up until 10:00 I am suddenly wide awake just after 3:00??? Makes no sense. It is particularly frustrating today, because when I do nap, I nap just about at mid-day, but today is the "office holiday potluck" so there will be no nap for me today. I have to go out shopping before then for a few things, and then to get the fancy breads that I'm taking to the potluck. Oh well... Last night I had a totally strange and (for me) new type of dream. I was in some sort of work environment, with a lot of other co-workers, going about my work routine. (I sure don't recognize any of the people, the location, or even the work, but in the dream it was all quite familiar, so I guess it's not important.) Anyway, right in the middle of it, I found myself running my tongue around in my mouth, sort of the way one does just after eating to find and dislodge any "leftovers". Next thing I know, I am spitting out mouthfuls of loose teeth. There was no pain, the teeth were all clean-appearing and not bloody. It was more the sensation of having a foreign object in my mouth. After clearing my mouth, I had this handful of cleanly washed teeth, which I proceeded to deposit straight into my shirt pocket and go searching for the supervisor to tell her I needed to go to the dentist. This was difficult to say because all my teeth had suddenly left my mouth. I've never had a dream about my teeth before. I don't much recall the details of the people or other environs in the dream, but I surely and clearly remember sweeping my mouth with my tongue and dropping teeth into my hand; I remember observing how clean they were and not bloody, and really not even very spittle-wet, either. And then I put them into my shirt pocket. Ethnic Cleansing? I have heard rumors about the "Ethnic Cleansing" of New Orleans for a while since the hurricane. Today I read an article in the Sun-Times: Cyril Neville says no to N'awlins, and I have to admit I don't totally understand it. It sounds like Neville would actually prefer to perpetuate a racial divide or something. And I really don't understand how he'd say there's only a handful of musicians actually making it in the music scene in New Orleans. There are musicians playing all over town (pre-Katrina, anyway), with all sorts of styles. Most are not nationally-known, and they don't play at the big venues, but so what? That doesn't mean there's no market for them. Granted, the financial reality for most musicians is difficult. Thousands of wannabes play their hearts out, trying to be the 'next big thing' -- although I imagine many of them realize they won't be, yet they continue to play and sing because that's what they do. It is their calling and they pursue it, hard times and all. I'm not a musician, I don't hang out in the music clubs, I don't buy CDs, and I couldn't tell one artist from another. I'm just not a big music fan. I'm sure Neville's take on the situation comes from being in a musical family that has "made it" to the big time, and from living among the musicians. But I think it is important to separate the financial realities of surviving in the music industry from the realities of racial tensions in New Orleans. I was raised in California in the 50s and 60s. I had classmates of many races. It just never entered my head that there was a difference that mattered between races. I lived in Arizona, and Texas, and Washington states as well. I heard about the occasional racial problem at a distance, but I don't recall it was a daily reality among the people I knew and worked with -- people of all races. Before Katrina, New Orleans had about 468,000 people, about 68% of which were black (I don't like the political designation of African-American to refer to a race -- it's even more silly to hear Europeans talk about the Africane-American population in THEIR countries!!) Mayor Nagin says about a quarter of the population has returned, but that it is mostly white. Well, does that mean there are people at the gates turning away the blacks? Does it mean there is a conscious effort to keep blacks out? I don't think so. Many of the destroyed parts of town were largely populated by blacks. After the "white flight" of the 60s and 70s, when white folks left for neighboring parishes, Orleans Parish became even more heavily populated with blacks. I don't endorse the "white flight" mentality of that era, and I don't understand why acknowledging the numbers today is such an issue. The people whose homes were lost were more predominately lower-income people and predominately black. But if there's no place for them to come back to, can it rightly be called an "ethnic cleansing" as if there was a racially motivated design to all of this mess? I'm an outsider on many counts, and I admit I do not understand it all. But it seems (as I have noted over the last 15 years living here) that much of the racial pot-stirring is begun with the black population. Racism is quite active in New Orleans, but I hear it mostly from angry black people who sound very much like a victim. Every social infraction is painted with the broad "racial incident" brush, when race was not a relevant factor. If the new New Orleans ends up predominately white, does that mean blacks were selectively barred from returning because they were black? Does it mean there was some effort to make it that way? Or would it be a reflection of what the floods did to the neighborhoods where people lived? Shit happens all around to every one, and I just don't understand playing the race card for every event. There are many wealthy and middle-class black families living Uptown, and many of them are returning to their lives and jobs. Being black wasn't a factor in where they lived, so why would being black be a causative factor for the destruction in other areas of town? I particularly found it offensive that Neville would say that those areas that are returned to wetland and greenspace would become golf courses and other places where blacks aren't welcome. Blacks play golf, and swim, and take their families to the parks. I don't understand this notion that blacks would be excluded from any of the restored New Orleans. Sounds to me like just more of the same "I'm a victim" mentality. Blacks should not be excluded just because they are black ... BUT blacks should likewise not be included JUST because they are black. If they want to play golf, let them play golf. Blacks are just as welcome to dress up and go to theater, same as whites. They are not excluded, so what's the fuss? Sure, there are cultural differences -- people enjoy different types of activities and social events. I don't see that as a racial thing, so much as a cultural thing, because I know damn good and well that blacks DO attend the theater and whites DO hang out in reggae clubs. Is it necessary to restore New Orleans to the same racial percentages that existed pre-Katrina? I don't think so. Shit happens all around, there are population shifts occuring all the time, and change sometimes comes very quickly depending on the circumstances. So, all in all, I think I am somewhat disturbed by the article and by Neville's position on the race thing. It just doesn't sit well with me. Oh by the way, did y'all hear that Bush has committed an additional $1.5 Billion to restore and improve the levees, putting in state-of-the-art systems and protections? Well, commitments have been made before, and while this is a good start I will temper my enthusiasm until at least the work is actually begun. One of my motivations for wanting out of New Orleans was my belief that it could not be made safe enough to prevent such a wide-scale destruction. But that was only one of my motivating factors, so it will be only one factor in changing my mind if I decide to stick around. I doubt it, of course, because I have already set into motion the actions toward leaving and taking control of my own life and future. Those plans involve closer proximity to my children and grandchildren and the ability to create an income that isn't dependent on where I physically live. Fancy new levees in one city won't make me closer to my family in another city. The ability to live in a safer city where I have a job doesn't so much matter if the job isn't all that much worth staying for. Does that make sense? In short, it's great if the government can actually perform on this commitment, and the local and state leadership can get their heads out of their asses long enough to work together on it. It will be a great help for New Orleans. Doesn't matter if I'm here or not, does it? |
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Let's Vote On It! 15 Dec 2005 Today the Sunnis and all the rest of Iraqi citizens are being given the opportunity to vote in a democratic election. This week, there is an ongoing debate to POSTPONE elections here in New Orleans, maybe as early as April, or as late as next September. Hmmm. Elections for mayor and city council members was supposed to occur in February. The arguments are these: Not enough voters have returned to New Orleans. Uhhh... there are Iraqi citizens living in the United States and elsewhere who are participating in their country's elections... how can they find their citizens around the world to vote, but we can't find our city's citizens around the country to vote? Not enough polling places safe for voting, not enough voting machines to conduct an election, not enough poll monitors to manage the sites, and blah blah blah. Uhhhh... it is impossible to set up an electronic website for collecting votes, with built-in security measures to ensure one-vote per registered voter? If people log in and cast a vote, they will register by name and address, which will be cleared instantly by voter records, and then they will either be allowed to enter the secured voting site or will be denied because they weren't registered. Once a voter has voted, they will be automatically prevented from voting again elsewhere. One voter, one vote. Not enough time for candidates to properly conduct a campaign to challenge the incumbents. Well, I saw campaign placards around town last spring! Are the people who are anxious to vote unable to find out who to vote for? Are candidates unable to put up a Web site, or engage in online or televised debates? I am quite confident that those candidates who are willing to take on the challenge will find a way to inform the voters of just where they stand on the issues most pressing to the city. I just don't understand the need for postponing the election on most counts. The one factor that "might" be an issue is that if we change leadership in the midst of this mess, will that help or hinder the progress? Along this same line is the question, "If Nagin and the current administration are being held to the fire for their pre-Katrina AND post-Katrina fuck ups, shouldn't they remain in office long enough to clean up their mess?" Well, I honestly don't know. Have they presented the kind of leadership that warrants an extended term in office? At what point in time will someone make the decision that all the circumstances are good enough for an election? Would it be totally shitty to say those who are IN New Orleans in February are the ones who get to vote? That would probably set up another whole debate about who is "really" a citizen, and I really don't want to go there. Perhaps those who can prove their citizenship as of August 28, regardless where they are today, should be allowed to vote. I don't know... just so many questions. But it just seems strange that our country (the United States of America, I mean) would go so such great lengths to ensure a national election in someone else's country, on an international scale, but all the great minds of this country can't figure out how to make a city-wide mayoral election happen. I just don't get it. Do you? |
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That Sinking Feeling 14 Dec 2005 The media seems filled with articles and op-ed pieces and letters to the editor, the governor, and the president. I'm just soooo tired of it all. But then along comes just one more. This one is from another local writer, Lolis Eric Elie, whose op-ed piece appeared today: That sinking feeling we're dying again. It is worth reading. At the end of it he writes: I remember that old adage: Wish in one hand, spit in the other, see which fills up first. But what can we do now but wish that our plight might someday be seen as a genuine national emergency? I've never heard that adage, but I think I like it. Wishing doesn't do much, but when that's all you can you, you do it with all you've got. And that's what the people all around me are doing. It's odd, but sometimes I feel like I'm living in a little coccoon, insulated against the everyday trauma surrounding me in the general New Orleans population. I'm completely overwhelmed and thoroughly saturated. It's difficult to feel ANYthing now when yet another person dredges up yet another experience. But everyone in town has had that experience, in one degree or another. Every citizen of New Orleans (and the entire Gulf Coast region, to some degree) was hit by Katrina and then by Rita. You can't just bring up that "ohmygawd, I'm so sorry to hear that" sort of empathy or sympathy (I can never remember which is correct here), because everyone is already drained of all available emotional strength. And then, of course, the Governor finally appeared before Congress to give her plea, as recorded in this transcript. I'm not sure what to make of it, but it's there for the reading. It will be interesting to see what actually comes of it all. But for all the rah-rah in many arenas across the country, I still get that sinking feeling -- the bottom line is that the government (pick a branch, any branch) isn't going to come through nearly as well or as fully as some folks are waiting for. As for me, well, you already know my plans -- I'm outta here as soon as I can be! Until then I'm just sort of numb. I will, however, close this post by saying that regardless whether the war and political shit in the Middle East is right or wrong (and it really doesn't matter), I have a much greater appreciation for the civilians and ordinary people trying to make sense of their everyday lives, living in limbo for years and years wondering what the fuck is going to happen next, and in some cases not even sure what the fuck has already happened to them. If the decisions-makers in the capitals of the world had to sit where I am sitting, in the midst of it day in and day out, I am confident that the majority of them would do everything in their power to make sure NO civilians in any country would ever have to put up with such ambiguity and foolishness. Civilians in the midst of war, or common citizens in the midst of disaster recovery -- we aren't just expendible, disposable , collateral damages, or whatever you call it, in support of "the big picture". Goddamn it, we ARE the big picture! |
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Saving Power 14 Dec 2005 A Bush aide has indicated Bush will reject a plea for assistance for Entergy-Louisiana, even though it is bankrupt, because their parent company, Entergy, is tauting record profits. If the parent company is doing so well, it should take care of its subsidiaries. Reportedly, the company investors will have to make up the difference. But no, that's probably not the way it will work. There are rumors that local customers will end up paying for the shortfall due to lost customers, with average bills increasing by up to 140%, which I think is totally ridiculous. Most of the people actually living in this city are struggling to survive. For the electric company to come in and double or triple the cost of basic utilities, how the hell will people be able to remain here? It's ridiculous. I have no idea what will happen if the local energy bills actually do jump that high. I'm quite confident there will be a major outcry throughout the region. So what am I doing to minimize my electric usage? I am trying to be cautious and careful in my use of utilities. My computer and peripherals are plugged into a power strip surge protector. Many people are of the mistaken belief that when they turn off the computer, it has actually stopped drawing power. Not so. When the computer shuts down, turn off the power strip, too! Ditto for the television, stereo and other devices. How do you think your VCR continues to show the time? If it is plugged directly into the wall outlet, it is drawing power in little bitty trickles, just waiting for you to punch the remote button to turn it all back on. I have put my TV, VCR, and DVD-player into a power strip also. When I turn off the television, I turn off the power strip, too, which turns off ALL power to the devices. Granted, these are teeny-tiny trickles, but just like that incessant drip in the bathtub, it all adds up over time. I listen to a battery-operated convenient little radio, rather than the stereo. This is the radio I got in trade for chewing tobacco during the first week after Katrina. And it is still running on the same six C-cell batteries. If I played cassettes, I'm sure it would run the batteries down faster, but so far, it's doing just fine. I'm going to look into other options as well, such as the wind-up self-powering radio (you crank it for 30 seconds and it runs for 24 hours), so that I won't even have to buy batteries, although I currently have a drawer full at the moment! (amazing how a hurricane prompts stock-piling certain essentials!) I shave my head down with the electric clippers about every week or so. It takes about 10 minutes or less, including touch-ups and trims, but that not only eliminates the need for blow dryers, it also means I don't have to spend money on shampoos! There are probably lots of other ways to further reduce my electric usage. I'll continue to investigate. Meanwhile... onward into the day! See ya! |
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We have a Blue Roof!!!! 13 Dec 2005 It's about friggin' time, eh? They arrived about 4:30 this afternoon and slapped a blue tarp over the roof, holding it into place with wooden strips nailed into the roof. O'course, I expect those nail holes to continue leaking somewhat, just not as much as what was there before. Actually I was lying on the bed (after a dental visit) thinking I was going to get a nap, when I heard someone walking on the roof and voices outside my window yelling for a ladder. A quick trip to the back yard confirmed my expectations. Yippeeee!!!! And it only took about 20-30 minutes. And the dental visit was a repair on the fillings I just got in October. Apparently the contact was not correct, and every time I ate I felt like I was filling a charity basket of food bits that wouldn't rinse or brush out, so had to floss after EVERYthing. Grrrrr... So anyway, he drilled out the original filling and replaced it with one that feels a whole lot better. And he didn't charge me for it, either! Very cool, indeed! The weather was mild but pleasant today, and I was overdressed in a sweater and light jacket. Oh well. Better safe than sorry. And the buses, for the most part, were running in pretty good synch. There was still some waiting at each bus stop, of course, up to 15 minutes, but it was not unpleasant. I just didn't feel anxious or irritated by having to wait. Stuff like that just doesn't seem to matter much right now. Odd. It's been a fairly quiet day, although I don't feel like I accomplished much. Oh well, tomorrow will have plenty of chores, tasks, and errands. Guess I'll go toward bed and read for a while. I am enjoying The Joy of Not Working so far, and have come across some interesting exercises designed to make me think in a different direction. I need to get out of habitual thinking patterns and open up to more alternative ways of thinking and seeing and feeling. |
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Lots of Notes 12 Dec 2005 Book Reports I mentioned last week when I finally got the last expected shipment of books long-ago ordered. Ragnar's Guide to the Underground Economy didn't impress me. It sounded more like ways to hide from Big Brother, keeping secrets, and flying under the governmental radar. Don't waste your money. Living Well on Practically Nothing, by Edward H. Romney, was pretty good, but seemed more like a manual on survivalist techniques, living in highly alternative lifestyles, but still had some useful information ... how how to build a liveable hut between two trees, and some other cool and useful stuff. O'course, he also recommends you send your kid to Bob Jones University, so you just have to take the good stuff and blow off the ignorant tomfooolery. I just start The Joy of Not Working, so I can't report on that, but it looks like it will have useful stuff on getting my head into a strong and healthy mentality. I'm sure I'll learn something useful. But the best book of the collection is How to Survive Without a Salary, by Charles Long, who has lived (and raised a family) without a salary for several decades, so he knows what he's talking about. He spends a worthy amount of time addressing mentality issues (and chasing away those "gotta get a job" demons). He isn't writing about living without money or income ... just living without depending on a 9-to-5 job and drawing a salary. He explains "needs", "budgets", and other essentials. He makes it pretty clear that living without a regular salary isn't necessarily easy, but it can be done, and it is pretty simple. You just do it! I won't use all the techniques he provides, since much of it just doesn't interest me. But there is enough good stuff in this book that I think just about everyone would find a lot of helpful insights and practical ways for living on less cash-dollars. If you can find the book, buy it. My Changing Views Over in the Uptown forum there's been great discussion about whether the city should move forward with plans to have a limited Mardi Gras celebration (this, upcoming, would also be the 150th anniversary of the Mardi Gras celebration in New Orleans, so there is some inherent significance in that as well), and someone commented: I saw one lady on the national news who is stuck in S.F. sleeping on the floor of an apartment. She said until the city GIVES her a "house full of furniture" she doesn't think there should be any partying. That same person, later in the post, also said: I truly feel for those who have lost so much...all of us have lost a lot. I just don't think that we should have to "equalize" the field and TRY to suffer as much as possible out of guilt for the people who lost more and can't or won't come home yet. After thinking about it, I responded: Thank you for putting into words what I've been feeling! As for Mardi Gras itself ... well, I've always been a party-pooper, fuddy-duddy kind of guy, even though I'm surrounded by parades during the season and can't leave my house. I mostly just ignore it during good years, so I'll probably just ignore it this time too. BUT, at a community level, I feel strongly that holding Mardi Gras is a GOOD idea for the spirit of the city and the local economy. A small Mardi Gras is better than none at all. If the woman in SF feels so strongly about it, she needs to find a way to get to the party when the party is happening and not be upset if the people who can and do show up choose to party without her. A lot of the folks already here don't have houses and furniture, either, just like her ... but they're here, and most of them got here under their own power, one way or another, as it should be. Gov't isn't going to send out buses to go pick up all the people that were taken out, and they aren't going to give everyone new clothes and new furniture. The city is in ruins, the infrastructure is shot to hell, and we're broke. So why throw a party? Because one of the fastest ways for this city to get money is to draw tourists. Plus, it will bring media attention back to the city. Once the cameras are turned on to film the 150th Anniversary of Mardi Gras in New Orleans, there will be opportunity to show how the rest of the city is NOT okay, we are NOT back to normal, the party has been foreshortened this year, and we need serious help. It is hard to repopulate the city unless there are places for people to live. Most of the homes here have been destroyed, rentals are through the roof, and there's just not that many places prepared yet for building new structures. But those places can't be built unless there are people are to build them. But they can't come back without a place to live. It's a vicious cycle. Some folks in the forums have been throwing around the race card with abandon, as if the "elitist" Uptown folks don't want blacks to come back to town. This, of course, is bullshit, because Uptown is almost as fully integrated as the rest of New Orleans was ... and MUCH of UPTOWN was also destroyed, not just the Ninth Ward or Gentilly or Lakeview. A good chunk of Uptown rich folks homes were destroyed ... black homes and white homes, makes no difference. What nobody wants back in New Orleans are the whiners, the criminals, the deadbeats. We can't afford them, we can't support them, and we don't need them. We need people of every job classification, educational background, and race to get back here as soon as they can. When people start whining about they "can't" come back because "the government" won't do anything, I don't have time for it. I have said repeatedly that there are elderly and children and genuinely disabled people who need and deserve to be with their families here. I have no problem with a family wanting their own people back. That is natural, normal, and right. But those who CAN work, should work, and not be a drain on the public budget, because there is no budget and such people cannot expect the rest of the people in town to carry them. This city has a reputation for corruption, murder, drug dealers, and welfare families two and three generations deep. We can't do that any more. Am I being a hard-ass? You bet! Am I going to stick around until this city is truly back on its feet? No fucking way. I will get out as soon as I can. I am sick of the bullshit. This wasn't much of a good city when I got here, and it sure as hell isn't getting any better at the rate it's going now. I won't leave in resentment and anger, but I will leave. The more I prepare myself now for what I'm about to do in the next year, the better I'll be able to pull it off. I can feel myself getting stronger in my resolve. Matching that resolve with a suitable plan of action to make it real shouldn't be that difficult. The one thing that continues to gnaw at me, and I know I've written it more than once (although probably deleted it as many times as I've left it), is that when it became inevitable that New Orleans was going to be hit, none of the people who know me and know I don't have a car called to see if I needed a way out. All of my personal (non-work) friends are gone now, and I have a different perspective of my co-workers. I've heard several times how they all knew where all the rest of the gang was but "nobody knew what happened to Ray and everybody was so worried." Well, when I called around to find a ride out, everyone was gone, and nobody else called me. So, fuck 'em, eh? I appreciate them as really good co-workers, but this one thing will continue to bug the snot outta me. When it came time to leave, I was left behind. I like to imagine I'm a stronger person for it, of course, but also just a little bit hurt or disappointed. And, of course, I won't bring it up to anyone at work, because they really are not responsible for me. It's up to me to just make damn sure I'm not left behind like that next time, and the best way to do that is to make sure I'm not around when "next time" comes. |
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August? WTF? 11 Dec 2005 According to this report, LSU Medical, Dental School Will Return To New Orleans In August. That's a l-o-n-g time to be in limbo, y'know? This brings up a lot of questions in my mind, but I realize that as long as I have a job and collect a paycheck, I shouldn't be too concerned with WHERE I am physically working. I'm not nearly so much in limbo as I had been, and not at all even close to the nebulous ambiguity still being experienced by people whose houses are completely gone -- not just seriously damaged, but broken up and washed down the street board by board. That's gotta suck, y'know? And the bickering continues as to WHO is going to put New Orleans back together, IF New Orleans should be put back together. There is a lot of anger and resentment about the government not doing enough. And, in many ways, I agree. Promises were made that simply have not been kept. On the other hand, there's a part of me that wonders what people did during natural disasters in previous generations, before "government" started taking a role in such things. Didn't people pick up what they could and start over somewhere? It is ALWAYS devastating, discouraging, depressing when Mother Nature unleashes her wrath on families, communities, and large swaths of the countryside. It has always been the people themselves who picked up and found a way to move forward. It's only in the last few generations that people have come to expect, and even demand, government hand-outs to such a large degree. Charity used to be the realm of churches and community organizations. Nowadays, even during "good" times, there is a line of people expecting the government to take care of them. It wasn't always like that, and I wish it were not so today. ===== Okay, so I went to make groceries this morning. I ended up finding the ONLY CART IN THE WORLD that had spastic wheels. I HATE when that happens. And, of course, it didn't turn spastic until I'd loaded my granny cart in the undercarriage and begun maneuvering through the store ... well, TRYING to maneuver through the store. What followed was 20 minutes of cajoling, cussing, muttering under my breath, and smiling awkwardly at people moving around me as I explained "It's always one wheel that has to go a different direction." I finally quit pretending it was okay, and I talked the cart around every corner with "Turn, dammit", and "No, NOT into the vinegar bottles, go the OTHER way." At one point I clipped a display of holiday cookies, clearly smashing some with the cart and throwing my shoulder in a direction Nature never intended in order to brace the rest of the display from falling. On the plus side of this little adventure, I was happy to see I'd gotten there early enough to find some good deals in the meat department. Large family size packages of chicken thighs, 10 per pack, were "buy one get one free" (I got 2 packs), country ribs were 25% off ("Meat Manager's Special"), and the bulk ground beef was similarly discounted. I have enough meat in the freezer to last the rest of the month for roughly $1 a day. Not bad. This evening will be relaxing. I finished the charity stockings yesterday, and they are hanging to dry at the moment. I need to finish the baby blanket this week on the knitting machine and then do a few other projects. THEN comes the holiday week when I will be madly rushing to finish some other stuff before January. UGH!!!! Onward into the evening I go. See ya! |
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Moving Soon 10 Dec 2005 I am moving servers at my hosting service so that both of my web sites will be hosted on the same servers, with the same options and so forth. I won't say what the other one is until it is ready on January 1 (but those who have known me a while might likely guess the other one). Anyway, you "might" notice some hiccups over the next few days as the new location address is propagated throughout the Internet ethers. Hopefully the move will be transparent and seamless, but in the event it isn't, I thought it fair to mention it so nobody worries if my site suddenly looks a mess ... or worse, seems inaccessible. Coffee Pods??
Yesterday I received a package in the mail, brought by Brown - a Philips Senseo coffee maker, part of the latest "pod" craze. I may have mentioned it before, but it was sent to me as a trial because I'm the organizer of a Meet-Up, and they wanted me to share it at my next meeting, in order to obtain surveys (and customers, I'm sure). It was no cost to me, and came with 18 little coffee pods, intended for single-cup brewing at a time.
Now, first of all, this might be okay for one or two people, first thing in the morning, but who would actually want to brew one cup at a time when at a meeting? It would take forever for everyone to get a cup. Nicer to brew a pot and then serve everyone, no? And the water reservoir in the back... sheesh! You have to refill it after every couple of cups. Each pod is design for (and the machine assumes) one 4-ounce cup of coffee. FOUR OUNCES! You have to use TWO pods, and punch the "2-cup" button, to get a single mug-full. And, forgive me, but I do not particularly care for a layer of froth over the top of my coffee. I drink my coffee black. Or, as I've heard in various ways: "I like my coffee the way I like my men....
Anyway, I'm not all that impressed with this gadget. You have to refill it too often, with both water and pods. The pods are probably quite expensive by comparison to regular coffee. I much prefer just fixing a pot of coffee the "old fashioned" way (who would have though 20 years ago that the new-fangled electric drip coffee-makers would become the old fashioned way???). I once had an expensive model that would start automatically in the morning with a timer, grind the beans, spit the grounds into the filter, and brew a pot all before I was out of bed. Very cool. Except that when the heating element quit working, it turned into a huge and unwieldy coffee grinder that continue to throw grounds into the brewing basket. And even when it did work, the steam from the brewing process would gummy up the grinding unit, so the entire thing had to be dismantled and washed and dried before another pot could be brewed. Sorry, but if anyone asks, I would strongly recommend AGAINST such a contraption. Grind up your beans in an old-fashioned grinder--manually, I mean, in a genuine burr grinder or plate grinder, not one of those spinning blade models, because a real grinder gives an even textured grind. The spinning-blade models chop the beans in mid-air as they are spun past the blades, and the resulting grounds are NOT uniform, which means the resulting pot of coffee is similarly not consistently good (or bad). And after getting the precise grind you like, brew it in a regular brewing pot, whether stove-top percolator or electric drip (although many electric drip models do not get the water truly hot enough for best quality steeping). Okay, enough of that. Bottom-line: I don't think I will invest in a new supply of 'pods'. I can buy small-size basket filters and create my own measured pods just fine, with my own coffee. "How?" you ask. Easy -- find a standard 1-cup measuring cup, insert a small basket filter into it, measure one scoop of coffee into it, give it a tap to evenly distribute the coffee, fold the sides of the filter down over the grounds, press it all down with a small can of mushrooms (which conveniently fits right into the 1-cup measure-- or you can use some other similarly sized flat-bottom object), and VOILA! There you have a home-made coffee brewing pod. Duuhhh!!! |
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Anyone else bothered by this? 9 Dec 2005 Craig's List is a popular online listing service for all sorts of really cool stuff -- it's like an internet version of the classifieds or the Want Ads. I was there perusing their New Orleans Apartments-Housing listings today. HOLY MOLEY!!!!! Spaces half as large as mine are now being listed at up to FIVE TIMES what I am paying. I can't believe the landlords and building managers have the audacity to abuse the locals this way. Now, don't get me wrong -- some of these places would easily take maybe twice my current rent. Some co-workers counted themselves quite blessed to find a little upstairs apartment for almost three times what I'm paying here. It's a bit nicer, of course, but even so it isn't "all that", if you know what I mean. It's NOT a "luxury" apartment, but mostly well-enough maintained ... if you don't count the windows that were blown out in the hurricane and not yet replaced. I wouldn't pay four figures a month for it, however. Sorry, I just wouldn't. Thousands of families are wanting to come back to New Orleans, many of whom were living in parts of town that were most severely damaged. They couldn't easily afford even normal rents for this part of town, but now they are forced to choose between staying at places of refuge in other cities, or lining up to "maybe" get a FEMA trailer. And, too, I realize that I am getting an incredible deal here at my current rental, which is about half the area's going rate for a similar unit. If I moved, I would expect to pay twice what I'm paying here. I would not, however, want to pay several times this amount for far less space. That's just wrong. ---------- My body is hurting in odd places today. After walking up all those stairs, and then carrying back down two milk crates of books and materials (plus Dr B's duffelbag of things he wanted), I am sure |
